IDIOT SIGHTINGS..... Nothing to do with C/L or planes. Just to make you smile

[Paul Taylor]

IDIOT SIGHTING:

We had to have the garage door repaired. The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a "large" enough motor on the opener. I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower. He shook his head and said, "Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower." I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, "NO, it's not." Four is larger than two.."

We haven't used Sears repair since.

IDIOT SIGHTING
My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I g ave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter. She said, "you gave me too much money." I said, "Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back." She sighed and went to get the manager who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said Were sorry but they could not do that kind of thing." The clerk then proceeded to give me back$1 and 75 cents in change.

Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.



IDIOT SIGHTING:
I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: "Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore."

From Kingman , KS .




IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE:
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind the counter for "minimal lettuce." He said he was sorry, but they only had iceburg lettuce.

From Kansas City

[John KruziK]

I went to a rural deli and asked for turkey and swiss on a half sub roll. The girl behind the counter asked "swiss what?"

[Wayne Collier]

John,  I can easily see that happening.  Having lived in several communities, eating habbits and food variety vary from place to place.  Often there is a noticable difference between "farm food" and "city food" even in the same general area.  When my wife and I moved into south Mississippi several years ago we noticed that some of the foods that we grew up with in northeast TX and northwest LA went by different names in south MS. As an example, in my home town turnips grow under ground and turnip greens grow on top of the ground.  In that part of MS, turnips grew on top of the ground and turnip roots grew underground. (neither part of the turnip plant is on my list of top ten favorites altough I do eat the greens on occasion)  My brother, while visiting in Georgia, was served a "taco" salad that consisted of Fritos and lettuce with some kind of sauce--far from the usual Tex-Mex with which he had been familiar.  That clerk may have been dingy or that deli may have had few customers who left the cheese off of swiss cheese.
 

[Bob Disharoon]

True story: For years,I had my wife believing the crow was the state bird or West Virginia(she is from there)

[Bill Little]

Thanks, Paul.  I enjoy those!

I have not forgotten you, please be patient!

[Leo Mehl]

One time in my hometown six stool resturant I ordered a cheeseburger. My first bit i could not chew. It was the end of the cheese wraper. I went to school with her daughter and we all had a good laugh.

[Clancy Arnold]

The best "Idiot Sighting" I have heard about.

An Idiot went into a store to rob it.
When the clerk handed him the bag of money.
He stuffed his pistol into the waist band of his pants, and it went off.
He ran from the store with the bag and was picked up about a mile away.
He had ran to his Grandmothers for help. 
The police recovered the bag of money.
He is recovering!!

Clancy

[Marvin Denny]

  This IDIOT  was trying to fly a multi engine model---  Sitting in FRONT of the model,  he decided  that  the engine on the inboard  wing, next to the fuselage (the #2 engine to you aircraft oriented types) needed to be needled slightly.  So this IDIOT  calmly reached around the prop  on the engine that needed needling with his right hand--- RIGHT THROUGH THE PROP on the # 1 engine which was running VERY well.  (about 12,000 RPM).   Whan the Dr  wanted to know what happened to chew up his hand so badly,  the guy told the Dr that it wasn't any of his blankety-blank business!!  I won't reveal the name of that IDIOT,,  but D*** that hurt.

   Bigiron

[Paul Taylor]

Marv,
Tell us you did not cut your hand up!!!!!

[minnesotamodeler]

The best "Idiot Sighting" I have heard about.

An Idiot went into a store to rob it.
When the clerk handed him the bag of money.
He stuffed his pistol into the waist band of his pants, and it went off.
He ran from the store with the bag and was picked up about a mile away.
He had ran to his Grandmothers for help. 
The police recovered the bag of money.
He is recovering!!

Clancy

This was a recent happening in the Twin Cities--he made the lead story on the local news.  The bullet went through his right testicle and into his leg. Makes me cringe to think about it.

--Ray

[Marvin Denny]

Marv,
Tell us you did not cut your hand up!!!!!

  No,  It wasn't cut up,  it was more like hamburger.  I am only glad it was a wooden prop and not one of the newer Composite types.   That happened many years ago in a small town  of Dumas TX.  It is about 30--40 miles north of Amarillo TX.
   Bigiron

[Joe Messinger]

A young man who was not the sharpest tool in the shed, decided he and his wife had enough children and went to his doctor to have something done about it.

His doctor recommended a vasectomy and explained that the procedure was rather expensive.

The young man said he couldn't afford something like that.

The doctor told him there was an alternative method which would only cost twenty five cents.  "First, take a cherry bomb, light the fuse and place it in an empty beer can. Hold the can on top of your head and count to ten."

The young man couldn't understand how that would work but doctor assured him it would so he went home, got a cherry bomb, lit the fuse, dropped it in the beer can and held the can top of his head.  He began to count. 1,2,3,4,5 on his free hand, put the can between his legs and continued with 6,7,... on his other hand.

[Leo Mehl]

I would say this guy was 50 cards short of a full deck.