For all the "Duffers" out there
When I die, bury me on the golf course, so my husband
will visit.
*Author Unknown
*
I don't say my golf game is bad, but if I grew tomatoes they'd come up
sliced.
*Author Unknown
*
I've spent most of my life golfing. The rest I've just wasted.
*Author Unknown
*
They call it golf because all the other four-letter words were taken.
*Raymond Floyd
*
The ardent golfer would play Mount Everest if somebody would put a flag
stick on top.
*Pete Dye (His golf courses reflect this belief!)
*
Golf is played by twenty million mature American men whose wives think they
are out having fun.
*Jim Bishop
*
It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. I did it
in one afternoon on the golf course.
*Hank Aaron
*
Golf is a game in which you yell "fore," shoot six, and write down five.
*Paul Harvey
*
Give me golf clubs, fresh air & a beautiful partner, and you can keep the
clubs and the fresh air.
*Jack Benny
*
Have you ever noticed what golf spells backwards?
*Al Boliska
*
The only time my prayers are never answered is on the golf course.
*Billy Graham
*
Reverse every natural instinct and do the opposite of what you are inclined
to do, and you will probably come very close to having a perfect golf
swing.
*Ben Hogan
*
Go play golf. Go to the golf course. Hit the ball. Find the ball. Repeat
until the ball is in the hole. Have fun. The end.
*Chuck Hogan
*
If you think it's hard to meet new people, try picking up the wrong golf
ball.
*Jack Lemmon
*
It's good sportsmanship to not pick up lost golf balls while they are still
rolling.
*Mark Twain
*
Don't play too much golf. Two rounds a day are plenty.
*Harry Vardon
*
Golf is a game in which one endeavors to control a ball with implements ill
adapted for the purpose.
*Woodrow Wilson
*
A golfer's diet: Live on greens as much as possible .
*Author Unknown
*
Gone golfin' ... be back about dark-thirty.
*Author Unknown
*
Born to golf. Forced to work.
*Author Unknown
*
My body is here, but my mind has already teed off .
*Author Unknown
*
May thy ball lie in green pastures .... and not in still waters.
*Author Unknown
*
If I hit it right, it's a slice. If I hit it left, it's a hook. If I hit it
straight, it's a miracle.
*Author Unknown
*
The difference in golf and government is that in golf you can't improve
your lie.
*George Deukmejian
*
Golf is a game invented by the same people who think music comes out of
bagpipe.